Monday, October 6, 2008

Is This The Wall Street Bailout? Or Another Nigerian Scam Email?


For the last year, I've posted all of the Nigerian scam emails that I receive. The last few weeks have been screaming for a parody.
The idea was sitting there.....waiting.
And I didn't do it, Dang it....
Someone else did, and it's brilliant

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude. I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.
I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s.
This transaction is 100% safe.
This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.
Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to
wallstreetbailout @washington.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction.
After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.


Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury,


Henry Paulson


Thanks to Samizdata.

Now you've gotta ask yourself....

1) How drunk would you have to be to send this guy any money if his appeal were to show up in your inbox?

2) Is there anything inaccurate about this letter? Does it reflect the reality of our situation?

3) Why do you continue voting for members of the BiPartisan political parties?

11 comments:

fembuttx said...

Because he is so damn sexy.

sandersonmom said...

He is definitely someone for you fembuttx...

fembuttx said...

Yeah, I like em bald and creepy.

sandersonmom said...

Why are talking about Whited like that?
Oh, he is BALDING not bald...so sorry.

fembuttx said...

Almost creepy enough, but not quite.

sandersonmom said...

And definitely damn sexy...ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
sorry fell out of my chair on that one...

fembuttx said...

I just blew coke all over my computer...The legal kind. Oh yeah, real damn sexy.

sandersonmom said...

We are definitely on the going to hell list...

fembuttx said...

Yeah...Cant wait for it. I think the record that I have been told to go to hell by The Whited is 3 times in one week.

This has been a good week so far.

sandersonmom said...

The words have never been spoken to me, it's just something that is a known fact.

The Whited Sepulchre said...

Cape Girardeau MO is too good of a place for either of you.
Go To Hell.

Love Always,

Allen