It's time for the readers of The Whited Sepulchre blog to vote on who in the last year has done the most to eliminate government waste.
There are several ways to end government waste. The best method, of course, is the one least discussed: don't give the government any of your money.
I'm going to nominate three candidates below. Nominate others as write-ins if you wish. The candidate with the highest total will receive the highly coveted Whitey Award.
1) [the President-elect's] nominee for Secretary Of The Treasury, Timothy Geithner, who at the time of his nomination for the post of chief tax collector, owed $42,000.00 in unpaid taxes, and, according to The Washington Post, is also being investigated for including using his child's time at overnight camps to calculate deductions for dependent-care, taking deductions for ineligible donations to charity and failing to pay an early-withdrawal penalty from a retirement plan.
A brilliant man, Mr. Geithner. Had he paid that 42K in taxes, it would've been wasted. Had he not deducted sending his kids to camp as a childcare expense, that money would've been blown on something useless. Timothy Geithner will be hard to beat.
2) James P. O’Hare, and David J. Dalaia. This is the duo that wheeled their deceased friend's rotting corpse into a check-cashing store in a failed attempt to cash their dead friend's $355 Social Security check.
Yes, they failed. Yes, they might have spent the $355 on alcohol. But if that money had stayed in The Treasury, it would've been given to some millionaire as an agricultural subsidy. A noble failure, and worthy of consideration for The Whitey.
3) Hillary Clinton, our next Secretary of State. Ms. Clinton's act of heroism didn't occur in the last 12 months, but since this is the first year The Whitey has ever been awarded, I'm allowing it for consideration. It is, after all, my damn award.
Former Senator Clinton, lover of Big Government, Policy Wonk, and disparager of Free Markets and Nafta, once claimed a two dollar tax deduction for donating some of Bill's used underwear to charity.
Remember, it's not the quantity saved, it's the quality. Who else would go to such extreme lengths to save such a paltry sum from The Gaping Maw Of The Beast? Every penny counts.
Those are my nominees. You may wish to nominate others.