Wednesday, August 5, 2009

John Jay Myers, Snickers, and Healthcare

My friend John Jay Myers, recent candidate for Dallas City Council, and an outspoken opponent of the Dallas Convention Center Whorehouse, sent me an email this afternoon.

John Jay calls this his Snickers Speech on healthcare.
I've added one more category of "solutions" at the end, simply because I can't leave good things alone.

Okay, there is a Snickers bar in front of you....You go to grab it, and I say "hold on there big fella... that will be $20". You say "$20 for Snicker bar? That is way way TOO expensive!"

Now... here come the solution(s)

The Socialist/Democrat solution:
We realize it's too expensive for you (notice the addition of "for you") so we will charge each of your friends $1 and then you can get that $20 Snickers bar for only $1.
Now your friends are a little upset....but that settles that... we have now made it "affordable".

The Libertarian Solution:
We realize it's TOO expensive. So we keep regulations out of it, keep the government out of it, open the free market, and next thing you know people are offering you Snicker bars for $10 then $5 then a Three Musketeer for $2 then a Snickers for $1 and then some guy shows up offering you a Snugget bar for .50 cents. (I have no idea what a snugget is...but it sounds delicious.)

The only reason the government wants to be involved in health care is because they want to maintain high prices for their lobbyist friends. High drug prices, high insurance prices, high care prices.

I would be way more accepting of asking the 50 states to each come up with their own plans, some would be "no plan at all", some would probably be pure socialism. But then we would have 50 states testing out different models... and we would find out soon which ones work best, just as we can now use California as a nice model for what not to do. But why go to the Federal Government right away?

Now why do we seem so upset, since on CNN they are saying "there isn't even a plan yet to be upset about"? Because we know when they come up with one, it will be introduced at 12:00 midnight, distributed at 3:00 am, and voted on at 10:00 am.

So, we need to make our voices heard now!

John Jay Myers

John Jay is one of the smartest people I know, he's a good speaker, and he runs a very succesful business. But I can't believe he forgot to include the folks who claim to be the opposition party:

The Republican Solution
We know the Snickers bar is expensive, but it costs a lot to keep it safe since it's so close to our border with Pakistan. If you don't give me money, Gays and Lesbians are going to get married. Did you know that they won't let you say a prayer before a public high school football game? I'm the only candidate willing to reach across the aisle in a true spirit of bi-partisan cooperation. The Snickers bar was less expensive when they didn't teach Evolution.

Snickers pics from here and here and here.


John Jay Myers said...

The last line was definitely an improvement.

Browncoat Libertarian said...

LOL, nice work JJM and WS!

TarrantLibertyGuy said...

I liked John Jay Myers Candybar Healthcare Story that I made one up too.. Candy is the best analogy subject.

Ask me about it at the EC. I threw it to some friends yesterday and they ate it up. Get it? Because of the candy? Get it?