I spend a lot of money at Home Depot.
When I give them my money, it's proof that I value ceiling fan pull chains, deck lumber, weed eater string, fertilizer and the expertise of Home Depot employees more than I value my money.
When the group at Home Depot gives me their merchandise and their expertise in exchange for my money, it's proof that they had rather have my cash than their inventory of chains, lumber, string, fertilizer, or their free time.
I'm no longer happy with the Home Depot closest to my home. I want to start swapping my money with a Lowe's Home Improvement Center.
Alan Smithee (R-California) has introduced legislation that would require me to give my neighborhood Home Depot a series of documented verbal and written warnings prior to spending my money at Lowe's. Plus, in some cases, the burden of proof would be on me to prove that I didn't stop purchasing time and materials from Home Depot because of the race, religion, age, sexual orientation, or political views of their employees.
Should I fail to follow the letter of the law, I could be required to pay unemployment compensation to the Home Depot employees who are affected by my shopping decision. My attorney has told me that making the switch probably isn't worth the risk.
And that's not the worst part....all I want to do is walk into a freakin' Home Depot, find an electrical department employee who can explain how to wire a multi-speed ceiling fan, buy a pull-chain from him, and get the hell out. But the Smithee Bill would make me responsible for the electrical department employee's health insurance ! ! ! ! I don't want to be the employee's mother, I just want to purchase some of his time, his work, his opinions, and a pull chain.
Please help lobby to kill the Smithee Bill, and all legislation similar to it.
If you know what I mean.