Barack Obama and the 900 Foot Jesus

There's a quote in atheist circles that goes something like "Give me all the reasons that you don't believe in all the other gods, and you'll have the reasons I don't believe in yours." 

In other words, list all the reasons that you don't believe in Anahita, Anat, Anath, Andhrimnir, Andraste, Andvari, or Angrboda - to name just a few gods from the beginning of the alphabet - and you'll have a good list of why some people don't "believe" in the god of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. 

You've probably heard of TV evangelist and faith-healer Oral Roberts.  (Please hang with me.  I'm going somewhere with this.)  Here's Roberts' CNN obituary:

In 1977, (Oral) Roberts said he had a vision of a 900-foot-tall Jesus, who told him to found the City of Faith Medical and Research Center. The biography said the center was aimed at "merging the healing power of medicine and prayer."
In 1986, Roberts announced that God would "call him home" unless he raised $8 million to send medical missionaries from the center -- an announcement that was widely publicized.

Are hospitals a good cause?  Yes. 

Do medical missionaries generally do good work and save lives?  Yes. 

Did you, or anyone else with good sense, donate money to Oral Roberts?  No. 

Why not?  Because most of us knew that a lot of the money would not be spent on the hospital.  We suspected that a 900-Foot Jesus didn't really appear to Oral Roberts in a vision, or tell him to send medical missionaries across the globe.  And finally, most of us prefer to give our charitable dollars to other causes. 

Several years ago, Barack Obama decided to radically change America's healthcare system.  He was going to give free (or at least affordable) healthcare to low-income Americans.  He had a plan.  And people on the political left seemed SHOCKED that this compassionate action was opposed by conservatives and libertarians. 

Given a choice, I'd give my dollars to the Oral Roberts City of Faith Medical and Research Center before giving it to Obama and the government (assuming there wasn't a 3rd option of burning the money).  I don't think that the government acts responsibly.  I believe that government spends a massive amount of money on itself.  I think Obama uses tax money to buy votes and keep his faction in power.  Plus, the Oral Roberts City of Faith doesn't operate drones or have an army going all over the place pissing off Arabs. 

Give me all the reasons you didn't donate to Oral Roberts, and you'll have the reasons that I oppose ObamaCare. 

Give me all the reasons that you wouldn't let Bernie Madoff do your investing in stocks, bonds, and commodities, and I'll give you the reasons that I get downright giggly when some Congressman starts blathering about "investing" in education, infrastructure, or the future. 

Carefully list all the reasons that you don't want Mexico or Brazil raising huge armies and navies and going around the world, making the planet safe for democracy.  You'll have the reasons that many libertarians don't want America doing that either. 

And on and on.....

Government isn't society.  Society can accomplish wonderful, wonderful things without government intervening.    Here's some Frederic Bastiat:

Socialism, like the ancient ideas from which it springs, confuses the distinction between government and society. As a result of this, every time we object to a thing being done by government, the socialists conclude that we object to its being done at all.

           We disapprove of state education. Then the socialists say that we are opposed to any education. We object to a state religion. Then the socialists say that we want no religion at all. We object to a state-enforced equality. Then they say that we are against equality. And so on, and so on. It is as if the socialists were to accuse us of not wanting persons to eat because we do not want the state to raise grain.

With that said, here's some MC 900 Ft Jesus.  Enjoy. 



 

Butt Prints In The Sand

One night I had a wondrous dream,
 Footprints beside a sandy stream,
Those steps left there by God's own son,
 I looked for mine, but I saw none.

 

 

But then some stranger prints appeared,
And I asked the Lord, “What have we here?
Those prints are large and round and neat,
But Lord, they are too big for feet.”

 

 

“My child,” He said in somber tones,
“For miles I carried you alone.
 In spite of all your "Freedom" talk,
 You still refused to stand and walk."

 

 

“You wouldn't work, you wouldn't vote,
 You didn't want to rock the boat,
 And so I thought it time to cut
 Our ties and drop you on your butt."

 

 

 

“Because in life, there comes a time,
When one must fight, and one must climb,
When one must rise and take a stand,
Or leave their butt prints in the sand.”

 

If you're interested in getting off your rear end, brushing off the sand, and working for less government, more freedom, and a better life for yourself, your children and your neighbors, go here to check out the Tarrant County Libertarian Meetup. 

 

 

Jesus and Ayn Rand

A friend of mine sent out a group email about Ayn Rand a few days ago.  The recipients were mostly church members.  Here’s the gist of it…..

A few days ago, (spouse) and I watched a documentary about the life and work of Ayn Rand.  She summed up her philosophy in two words:  objective reality.  Even though her parents were Jewish, at about age 10, she confided to her diary that she was an atheist.   Possibly she used objective reality because, leaving The Soviet Union in 1926, she saw how propaganda and coercion could create false reality and control people.  She abhorred altruism, the idea on which Communism and Nazism were able to function by convincing people that the individual is unimportant, that only the group, the nation is worthy of dedication.  She believed each person should pursue self interest openly without deception.

Is it possible that, when we do something good or charitable, we do so in order to feel better about ourselves, to earn approval of our peer group or, in some cases,  to earn a reward after death?  If true, it would mean the person doing good is acting on enlightened self interest. 

I realize you may consider this silly and unworthy of thought or comment, but if you have any thoughts on Rand's work or this  subject, I would be glad to receive them.   Possibly you will share your thoughts with this group of addressees.

I sent back the following, from Rand’s 1964 Playboy interview:

“My views on charity are very simple. I do not consider it a major virtue and, above all, I do not consider it a moral duty. There is nothing wrong in helping other people, if and when they are worthy of the help and you can afford to help them. I regard charity as a marginal issue. What I am fighting is the idea that charity is a moral duty and a primary virtue.

The fact that a man has no claim on others (i.e., that it is not their moral duty to help him and that he cannot demand their help as his right) does not preclude or prohibit good will among men and does not make it immoral to offer or to accept voluntary, non-sacrificial assistance.

It is altruism that has corrupted and perverted human benevolence by regarding the giver as an object of immolation, and the receiver as a helplessly miserable object of pity who holds a mortgage on the lives of others—a doctrine which is extremely offensive to both parties, leaving men no choice but the roles of sacrificial victim or moral cannibal . . . .

To view the question in its proper perspective, one must begin by rejecting altruism’s terms and all of its ugly emotional aftertaste—then take a fresh look at human relationships. It is morally proper to accept help, when it is offered, not as a moral duty, but as an act of good will and generosity, when the giver can afford it (i.e., when it does not involve self-sacrifice on his part), and when it is offered in response to the receiver’s virtues, not in response to his flaws, weaknesses or moral failures, and not on the ground of his need as such.”

This prompted a few emails about Rand’s atheism, and the vast philosophical chasm that separates Ayn Rand and Jesus.  Here’s a sample, from a guy I genuinely admire:

Ayn Rand was very clear that her personal philosophy is the antithesis of the Christian teaching on selfless love.  She disagreed with Jesus in a fundamental way and made no bones about it.  It follows, therefore, that if Christians are attracted to her philosophy they are either confused, they think Rand seriously misread Jesus, or they see Christianity as a private matter with few moral implications.  I think Rand was right on the money.  The two philosophies are antithetical.  Jesus has my vote.

It went on for a while longer.  Most of the people copied on the email were good church people, all of whom I respect and admire.  I like to think that these are the people who would come to my aid if my family were to get into serious trouble.  I like to think that I would help them out in similar circumstances.  But I started thinking about what Rand said and what Jesus said.  NOT how they’ve both been interpreted, but what they actually said. 
Jesus supposedly said the following, in Matthew 6.  The additional italics are mine, for emphasis:

No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon (money).

Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

Behold the birds of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much better than they?
 
Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his height?

And why do you worry about clothing?   Look at the lilies of the field, how they grow; they don't work, neither do they spin fabric for themselves:

And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not dressed like one of these flowers.

Wherefore, if God so clothes the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, you of little faith?

Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, How shall we be clothed?

(For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knows that ye have need of all these things.

But seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

That's kinda intense. 
Don't worry about what you're going to eat or drink. 
Look at the birds.  They don't grow crops, but God cares about them and provides for them.  Aren't you better than they are? 
Consider the flowers.  They don't work.  They don't make fabric, or anything else, yet they're more beautiful than Solomon! 
 

Here’s Matthew 5:40 – 42:  And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away your coat, let him have your cloak also. And if someone forces you to carry his load for a mile, go with him for two miles. Give to him that asks upi, and from him that would borrow of you, turn not him away”.

Translated: If the damn lawyers take away your jacket, let 'em have your overcoat also.  If someone forces you to carry their load for a mile, go ahead and put in two miles.  GIVE to anyone who wants what you have, and if someone wants to borrow from you DO NOT turn them away. 

Luke 14:12-14: “Then said he also to him that asked him, When you make a dinner or a supper, call not your friends, nor your brethren, neither your kinsmen, nor your rich neighbors; lest they also ask tyou again, and a recompense be made thee. But when you make a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind: and you shall be blessed; for they cannot recompense you: for you shall be paid back at the resurrection of the just”
 
Don't have family over for dinner.  Ever.  Never, ever, ever.  Always feed the street people first. 
 
Now.... Compare Ayn Rand's statements on charity with those of Jesus.  I only know of one Christian who lives his life according to the statements of Christ quoted above, and most people think the guy is stark raving mad.  Maybe he is. 
 
Everyone that I know, and I mean everyone, Christian or not, tries to maintain health and life insurance, and keep up their house payments.  They try to get educations so they can provide for themselves and their families.  I've never seen anyone go into debt so they can feed more strangers, and I've never seen a robin drop worms into every nest in the forest. 
 
The average yearly income on this planet is $6,000 per person.  I've never known any follower of Christ to give away his stuff until he had less than that.  Ayn Rand advocated giving to people you feel like giving to, but only if it's not going to put you at risk.  Jesus taught that we should sacrifice ourselves, our stuff, and our security. 
 
In short, there has been an ongoing battle in the Christian church between the philosophy of Ayn Rand and the philosophy of Jesus. 
 
Ayn Rand has won it. 

Happy Easter - The Rough Draft Screenplays

I first posted this back in 2008.  Enjoy!

*****************

I was in the downtown library this afternoon, and saw some papers sticking out of the top of "The Art and Craft of Playwriting", by Jeffery Hatcher. It turned out to be an interesting collection of emails, photocopies of the Bible, rough drafts, and script outlines. Lots and lots of outlines. I believe I have assembled everything from this correspondence in the correct order.

I hope I'm not violating anyone's privacy by publishing this, but it seems like a remarkable project that was abandoned too soon. I encourage others to try it.

******************
Jim,
I know we haven't talked or emailed recently, but I've been asked to "fix" the script for a stage version of The Life of Jesus. The group employing me believes that the Bible is the world's #1 bestseller because it is infallible and 100% free from any errors or mistakes. If that's the case, then it really is the highest quality product ever produced, right?

They see a huge market for a stage version. If they can produce an equally "inerrant" script, the dramatic/stage version should be as popular as the printed text. It should earn a fortune on Broadway, right?

The resurrection scene is giving us some trouble. Since there are five accounts of the event in the New Testament, the original playwright was having a hard time blending everything into a single narrative. This is my first time to be called in as a "script doctor".
Remember, this is only a rough draft, (see attachment) but please let me know what you think.

Your friend,

Brad

 

*********************************
The Resurrection - the infallible and inerrant stage version, rough draft #1, based on the book of Matthew.

Characters: Mary Magdalene, another woman named Mary, an Angel, Two guards, Jesus, Numerous Chief Priests and Elders, Eleven Disciples

Scene: Dawn, Monday in Jerusalem, Sometime around 33 C.E.

Stage design: In the middle of the stage is a tomb with a large stone that can be rolled away from the door as necessary. Overhead rigging is needed to lower an angel to the front of the tomb. To the right of the stage is lighting to simulate "dawn". All trees and bushes around the set must be shaken to simulate an earthquake. A large piece of sheet metal, hanging from a frame offstage, produces the sound of thunder for this earthquake. A mountain scene representing Galilee must be moved into place from stage right.

Mary Magdalene and Mary enter from stage left and approach the tomb. (Matthew 28:1) They're carrying extinguished oil lamps, (no longer burning because of the slowly rising sun). When they are a few feet away from the stone, there is a frightening earthquake. All trees and shrubbery shake violently and thunder echoes across the stage. (Matthew 28:2)
The Angel is lowered to the front of the tomb, and he/she/it rolls away the stone that blocks the door. Rolling away the stone requires superhuman effort and should be accompanied by dramatic music and much flexing and straining on the part of the angel. When finished, the angel calmly sits on top of the stone. The guards begin shaking with fear. The angel looks toward the two women.

Angel: (panting) "Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: 'He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.' Now I have told you." (Matthew 28:7)

The women run away from the tomb, stage left. Suddenly Jesus steps in front of them from stage left.

Jesus: "Greetings". (Matthew 28:9)

The women fall to his feet.

Jesus: "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me."

The women exit stage left. Jesus disappears backstage. The guards rise, rub their eyes, and begin walking downstage. The chief priests and elders enter from stage right.

Guard #1: We were guarding the tomb.
Guard #2: There was an earthquake.
Guard #1: An angel came down from heaven and rolled away the stone.
Guard #2: The angel told a couple of women that Jesus has risen. (Matthew 28:11)

The chief priests and elders participate in a brief huddle, then turn to the guards with bags of money.

Chief Priest: Here's some money. You are to say "His disciples came during the night and stole him away while you were asleep. If this report gets to the governor, we will satisfy him and keep you out of trouble." (Matthew 28:14)

The soldiers take the money and exit stage right.

The curtain briefly closes and re-opens to show a depiction of Galilee. Jesus appears to eleven disciples on top of a mountain. (Matthew 28:16)

Jesus: "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (Matthew 28:20)

Curtain

*****************************************************

Dear Brad,

I LOVE what you've done so far. (How do you feel about the Olsen twins playing the two Marys? It's just a thought....)

However, I've got a few reservations about using only one source text to tell the story. There are three other gospels, right? See if you can work in some dialogue from those other guys.

I could see Russell Crowe as the angel. What do you think?

-Jim

**********************************************************

Jim,
Thanks for the advice. In this next draft, (see attachment) I've tried to make the scene totally consistent with the book of Mark. It's been difficult, since the oldest manuscripts of Mark all end at verse 8 of Chapter 16. Not as much text to work with, but it is the account that most scholars believe was written first. I think it is much more human, more believable, and much more intense. Please let me know what you think. I'll combine it with the material in the previous version later.
Your friend,
Brad

The Resurrection - the infallible and inerrant stage version, rough draft #2, based on the book of Matthew and Mark.
Characters: Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, an Angel, Two guards, Jesus, Numerous Chief Priests and Elders, Eleven Disciples, Salome, who carries a basket of spices, A Young Man in a white robe.
Scene: Sunrise, Monday in Jerusalem, Sometime around 33 C.E.
Stage design: In the middle of the stage is a tomb with a large stone that can be rolled away from the door as necessary is carefully placed to the left of the open door of the tomb. Rigging must be in place to lower an angel to the front of the tomb The Young Man in the white robe is waiting inside the tomb as the curtain rises. All trees and bushes around the set must be shaken to simulate an earthquake. A large piece of sheet metal is necessary to produce the sound of thunder associated with the earthquake. A mountain scene representing Galilee must be moved into place from state right.

Mary Magdalene and Mary and Salome (with a basket of spices) enter from stage left and approach the tomb. (Mark 16:1)
Salome: "Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?" (Mark 16:3)
As they approach the tomb, they slap themselves on their foreheads in amazement. The stone has already been rolled away. (Mark 16:4) The three women walk inside the tomb, where they see the Young Man In A White Robe. They are obviously alarmed. (Mark 16:5)
When they are a few feet away from the stone, there is a frightening earthquake. All trees and shrubbery shake violently and thunder echoes across the stage.
The Angel is lowered to the front of the tomb, and he/she/it rolls away the stone, then sits on top of it. The guards begin shaking with fear.

Angel: "Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: 'He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.' Now I have told you."

The women run away from the tomb, stage left. Suddenly Jesus steps in front of them from stage left.
Young Man In A White Robe: "Don't be alarmed. You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen ! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, 'He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.'" (Mark 16:7)
Jesus: "Greetings".

The women fall to his feet.

Jesus: "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me."

The women exit stage left. Jesus disappears backstage. The guards rise, rub their eyes, and begin walking downstage. The chief priests and elders enter from stage right.

Guard #1: We were guarding the tomb.
Guard #2: There was an earthquake.
Guard #1: An angel came down from heaven and rolled away the stone.
Guard #2: The angel told a couple of women that Jesus has risen.

The chief priests and elders participate in a brief huddle, then turn to the guards.

Chief Priest: Here's some money. You are to say "His disciples came during the night and stole him away while you were asleep. If this report gets to the governor, we will satisfy him and keep you out of trouble."

The soldiers take the money and exit stage right.

The curtain briefly closes and re-opens to show a depiction of Galilee. Jesus appears to eleven disciples on top of a mountain.

Jesus: "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

The women run from the tomb, stage left, trembling and bewildered. They say nothing to anyone, because they are obviously afraid. (Mark 16:8)

Curtain

**********************************************

Dear Brad,

I hate to tell you this, but I'm disappointed. What happened to the earthquake? What about the lightning? I thought this play had a huge special effects budget.....

What happened to the soldiers? How are we going to convince Russell Crowe to show up if he's just a young man in a white robe and not an angel?

Oh, and where is Jesus? You mean to tell me that you've written a scene about the resurrection of Jesus that doesn't include Jesus?

There's no dramatic arc to your story.

Mark is the oldest of the four Gospels, right? If that's the case, then lose him. Any Gospel author who writes an account of the Resurrection without including Jesus.....well, that writer doesn't have any business writing a Bible story.

You need some action. You need to add additional scenes. You need some music. The three women can't just leave the tomb and not tell anybody what they've seen. Is that really all there is in the book of Mark? Your latest draft makes "My Dinner With Andre" look like "Die Hard 3".

Show me what you can do.

-Jim

******************************************

The Resurrection - the infallible and inerrant stage version, rough draft #3, based on the Gospel of Matthew Mark Luke.

Characters: Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary the mother of James, some other women, Two Men in Clothes that gleam like lightning, Jesus, two people going to Emmaus, and Eleven Disciples.

Scene: Sunrise, Monday in Jerusalem, Sometime around 33 C.E.

Stage design: In the middle of the stage is a tomb with a large stone placed to the left of the door. Several strips of linen litter the floor inside the tomb. Special lights are required for the two men in clothes that gleam like lightning.

Stage right represents a rural road for the scene going into Emmaus. A table is needed for the bread breaking in Emmaus. An area on the left side of the stage represents Bethany, where Jesus ascends to heaven. Rigging is required for an authentic ascension.

Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Mary the mother of James enter from stage left and approach the tomb. Their lamps aren't burning, since it is already early morning (Luke 24:1) Through hand gestures, they express their surprise that the stone has already been rolled away from the entrance. Suddenly, two men in clothes that gleam like lightning appear before them. (Luke 24:4) The Women bow their heads to the ground in fear.

Two men in clothes that gleam like lightning: "Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here' he has risen ! Remember how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee: 'The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, be crucified and on the third day be raised again.' " (Luke 24:7)

The women walk away from the tomb, stage left, where they are met by Eleven Disciples.

Mary: We were going to the tomb to prepare Jesus' body with spices, but the body was missing. Two men in clothes that gleam like lightning told us that Jesus wasn't there, and that he'd risen. Remember when Jesus said he'd be crucified and on the third day be raised again?" (Luke 24:9)

The disciples scratch their heads, trying to remember if Jesus ever said any such thing.

Disciples: We don't believe you. Your words, to us, sound like nonsense. (Luke 24:11)

Peter runs into the tomb, bends over, and looks at the strips of linen littering the floor. He walks away, wondering what really happened. (Luke 24:12) Peter doesn't want to return to his fishing career, and wonders if there might be some way to make some money off all this.

Resurrection Appearances Montage

From the orchestra pit comes the piano introduction to a familiar song. At first it is too faint to be heard clearly, but after about 30 seconds (which gives the crew time to set up the scene on the Road To Emmaus) we recognize it as Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You".

Whitney Houston (sung): "If I should stay,
I would only be in your way.
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you every step of the way."

Two People Going To Emmaus enter from stage right. (Luke 24:13) Jesus approaches from backstage and begins walking with them. They read the lengthy dialogue found in Luke 24:17-27.

Whitney Houston:
"And I......will always
Love youuuuuuu....
I will alwaaaaaaayss
Loooooove Youuuuuuu..."

The two men invite Jesus to stay with them in Emmaus, and they approach the table at stage left, where Jesus breaks bread, gives thanks, and gives them pieces of the bread. There is a blinding flash of light, and Jesus disappears. (Luke 24:31)

One Of The Men Going To Emmaus: Hey, that was Jesus ! It had to be ! I wonder why we couldn't recognize him?

The Second Man Going to Emmaus: Yeah, it had to have been Jesus. Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us? (Luke 24:32)

The two men begin the long run from Emmaus to Jerusalem, a journey of 7 miles. (Luke 24:33)

Whitney Houston:
"I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all
you've dreamed of.
And I wish you joy
and happiness.
But above all this,
I wish you looooove."

The two men continue to simulate running in place toward Jerusalem. Assuming world record 4-minute miles, this scene will last 28 minutes or longer. Be prepared to play the Whitney Houston recording as many times as necessary.

Whitney Houston:
"And I......will always
Love youuuuuuu....
I will alwaaaaaaayss
Loooooove Youuuuuuu..."

The two men finally return to Jerusalem, where they find the remaining eleven disciples, plus some hangers-on.

Two Men: It's true ! The Lord has risen and has appeared to Simon. We were walking to Emmaus, and a man joined us on the road. We didn't recognize him until he broke some bread. Jesus always had a very distinctive way of breaking bread ! (Luke 24:35)

The Disciples: (Talk amongst themselves)

At this point, they look around and see that Jesus is standing among them.

Jesus: Peace be with you. (Luke 24:36)

The disciples begin to tremble with fear. As the instrumental music continues, Jesus recites the verses found in Luke 24:38-49, while allowing the disciples to see his wounded hands and feet, and eating some fish (Luke 24:43).

Jesus leads them to an area representing the town of Bethany. He lifts his hands to bless them, and then begins to slowly ascend to heaven. (Luke 24:51)
Whitney Houston:
"And I......will always
Love youuuuuuu....
I will alwaaaaaaayss
Loooooove Youuuuuuu..."

Curtain

***************************************

Dear Brad,

Now you're on to something. You can make this work. I don't know how you're going to reconcile the action in this draft with the first two, but at least you've got a decent storyline to work with.

Why didn't they include all this great material in the older versions? And I'm glad we're back to having two angels, or men in clothes that look like lightning. Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman, maybe? I've become interested in this, and have started doing some reading on my own. Please send me your treatment from the Gospel of John as soon as you finish it.

-Jim

***************************************

The Resurrection - the infallible and inerrant stage version, rough draft #4, based on the Gospel of Matthew Mark Luke John.

Characters: Mary Magdalene, Simon Peter, The Disciple That Jesus Loved, Two Angels In White, Jesus, Thomas, The other disciples

Scene: Before Sunrise, while it is still dark. Monday in Jerusalem, Sometime around 33 C.E.

Stage design: In the middle of the stage is a tomb with a large stone placed to the left of the door. Several strips of linen litter the floor inside the tomb. Over the stage are several small spotlights, which illuminate the main characters in the pre-dawn darkness. There is a burial cloth on the floor that was once wrapped around Jesus' head. To the left of the stage is a small set representing a room in Jerusalem. Another backdrop represents the Sea of Tiberias. A boat large enough to hold several disciples waits offstage, and holds a net. Inside the net are 153 fish. (152 obviously wouldn't be enough. 154, of course, is too many.)

Mary Magdalene enters from stage left. She is carrying a functioning oil lamp, since it is still dark (John 20:1). The flame from her lamp is the only thing visible in the darkness. A spotlight gradually comes on to reveal Mary Magdalene to the audience. She walks to the tomb in the dark, and holds the lamp inside to see that the stone has been removed from the entrance, turns around and returns to Stage Left, where she sees Simon Peter and The Disciple That Jesus Loved (TDTJL - John 20:2).

Mary Magdalene: They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we don't know where they hav put him !

Simon Peter and TDTJL run toward the tomb, and TDTJL arrives first. TDTJL looks into the tomb, but doesn't go inside. Simon Peter walks into the tomb and sees the burial cloths on the floor. TDTJL then goes inside. They don't understand that Jesus has risen from the dead (John 20:9). They are puzzled.
Everyone leaves the tomb to go home except Mary Magdalene, who stands outside the tomb crying. While she is crying, she looks inside the tomb and sees Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman two angels dressed in white. They are seated in the area where Jesus' body had been.

Two Angels: Woman, why are you crying?

Mary Magdalene: They have taken my Lord away, and I don't know where they have put him.

Jesus suddenly appears outside the tomb. Mary Magdalene doesn't realize that it is Jesus. She thinks he is a gardener.

Jesus: Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?

Mary Magdalene: Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.

Jesus: Mary.

Mary Magdalene: Teacher !

Mary Magdalene moves toward Jesus, arms open wide. Jesus remembers Mary Magdalene's former profession, and that the two angels are still watching, and that angels tend to gossip.

Jesus: Do not hold onto me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, 'I am returning to my Father, to my God and your God.' "

Mary Magdalene runs to Stage Right, where the disciples are waiting in a locked house, since they are afraid of Jews (John 20:19)
Mary Magdalene: I have seen the Lord !
As Mary Magdalene is telling the disciples all the other things that happened, Jesus suddenly appears among them. Andrew, one of the disciples, rises to check the locks. Andrew is obviously concerned that despite all his precautions, a Jew got in the house.
Jesus: Peace be with you !
Jesus shows the disciples his hands and side. The disciples are overjoyed. (John 20:20)
Jesus: Peace be with you ! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.
Jesus breathes on them, laying the groundwork for the doctrine of The Trinity in about 300 more years.
Jesus: Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven. (John 20:22)
The disciples are obviously pleased to hear this, and appear to be drunk with power.
The curtain briefly closes, and re-opens to show the same room later that evening. Thomas is now at the center of the room.
Disciples: We have seen the Lord !
Thomas: Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe it.
The curtain briefly closes, and re-opens to show all of the disciples in same room exactly one week later (John 20:26) as noted by a Page-A-Day calendar resting on a table near the front of the stage. Jesus suddenly appears among them. Once again, Andrew goes from door to door checking the locks.
Jesus: Peace be with you ! Thomas, put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop your doubting and believe.
Thomas simultaneously feels Jesus' right hand and left side. (The director should resist the temptation to have the two of them do a waltz while locked into this position. There is no mention of any dance is John's gospel.)
Thomas: My Lord and my God ! (John 20:28)
Jesus: Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.
The Voice Of James Earl Jones/Narrator: Jesus did many other miraculous signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name. (John 20:30-31)

From the orchestra pit comes the piano introduction to a familiar song. It's too soft to recognize at first, but we later recognize R Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly".

R Kelly: "I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly"

Jesus leaves the room, and begins performing miracles and other miraculous signs. He gives sight to the blind, causes the lame to walk, and bails out the Big 3 chariot makers.

There is a brief curtain to set up the Sea Of Tiberias scene.

The Voice Of James Earl Jones/Narrator: Afterward Jesus appeared again to his disciples by the Sea of Tiberias. It happened this way: Simon Peter, Thomas, Nathanael, the sons of Zebedee, and two other disciples were together. So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. (John 21:3)
Early in the morning, Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.

Jesus: Had any luck yet? Are they biting? What are you using for bait? Caught anything yet? (John 21:5)

Disciples (irritated): No.

Jesus: Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.

The disciples struggle to bring their nets on board because of all the fish. (John 21:6)

R Kelly: See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me oohh
If I can see it, then I can be it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it...
I believe I can fly....

Simon Peter jumps into the water with his corner of the net. The other disciples remain in the boat, pulling the net full of 153 fish. By the time they arrive on shore, Jesus has a fire going and some fish cooking. (John 21:9)

Jesus: Bring some of the fish you just caught.

They drag the net to dry land.

Jesus: Come have some breakfast. (John 21:12)

Voice Of James Earl Jones/Narrator: None of the disciples dared ask him, "Who are you?" They knew it was the Lord.....

Jesus takes the bread and gives it to the disciples, along with some fish.

Voice Of James Earl Jones/Narrator: This was now the third time Jesus appeared to his disciples after he was raised from the dead.

Jesus, Simon Peter, TDTJL, and the other disciples give a straightforward reading of the dialogue found in John 21: 15-24.

Voice Of James Earl Jones/Narrator: Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written. (John 21:25)

Curtain

*******************************

Brad,
That last line of you latest draft...."If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written."
All I can say is, thank God we don't have those other books to worry about.

I do have one other suggestion for you. In an earlier email, I told you I've been doing some reading on my own. I Corinthians, chapter 15, verses 3 though 8? Have you ever read it?

Paul says in I Corinthians that after Jesus rose on the third day after his crucifixion, Jesus first appeared to Peter, then to the Twelve Disciples, then to 500 other people, then to James, then to the apostles, and then to him (Paul).

That's supposed to be infallible and without error also, right? Why don't you start with that, and then see how you can make the gospel stories fit into Paul's I Corinthians story?

Just a suggestion.....

Your friend,

Jim

***************************

Jim,

I hate to tell you, but I've given up on this project. I've used up 15 legal pads, two Bibles, and countless hours on the internet trying to make the pieces of this puzzle fit together. All of the funding for the Off-Broadway production has dried up; the producers are now working on a stage play that will explain Fidel Castro's role in The Kennedy Assassination.
I didn't even make it to Paul's story in I Corinthians. I wish you hadn't sent those verses to me. They make my head hurt. I don't remember how Paul died, but I hope it was painful.
I've been reading a lot also, mostly books by a guy named Dan Barker.
I'm also interested in some guys named Marcus Borg and John Shelby Spong, and anyone else who doesn't use the words "inerrant" or "infallible".

Your friend,

Brad

On Jesus And Santa Claus

I was in the 2nd grade, working on homework at a desk in our den. It must have been close to Christmastime, because my mother was explaining something about Santa Claus to my little sister.
I don't remember my sister's question, but it probably involved the North Pole, elves, reindeer, Rudolph, or (temporal) punishments and rewards for being either naughty or nice. In one blinding moment the Santa Claus/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy Axis Of Impossibility revealed itself to me.
There are no elves. Reindeer can't fly. Old fat guys can't get down chimneys. A giant rabbit can't leave us colorful plastic eggs (from Gibson's department store) filled with coins or candy.
Any fairy with a tooth fetish must be very lonely fairy indeed.

I had figured out the conspiracy, and needed some clarification on the finer points so I looked up from my homework and asked "Hey, there can't be a Santa Claus who brings all this stuff. Is it just you and Daddy, or is it somebody else?"

My Mother went through a frantic series of shushing gestures, throat slashings, and brow-furrowings, and then said something like "Of course there's a Santa Claus", followed by a wink-wink nudge-nudge. Once my sister left the room, she explained that Santa Claus was something that parents did to make Christmas more fun for children, along with a follow-up conversation about the need to conceal this from my sisters and brother. I immediately felt like more of an adult since I was in on what was obviously a very adult secret.

I relished the conversations I could have with my parents and other adults about what other kids were getting from Santa Claus. I had access to the people behind the curtain, the ones who made the magic happen.

I had a friend named Glenn Williams who was a year younger than me. (Note to self: write a post about the day Glenn was working at The Rushing Winery and managed to bottle his thumb.) Another friend, Walt Burns, took Glenn aside one day and told him all about Santa Claus. Glenn has told me at least three times about how mad he got at Walt for doing this.

Up until the time Walt spilled the beans, Glenn had a worldview that included a benevolent old guy who paid attention to his behavior and rewarded him with great stuff every December 25th. People were killing each other in Viet Nam but Santa was watching. Elves were making toys for people who were good, even if kids our age were starving in communist China. And Walt Burns had to ruin everything. There was no magic guy in a sleigh.  It was just Pat and Guy B. Williams waiting up past their normal bedtime to bring Glenn's toys down from the attic.

Other kids claimed to believe, or pretended to believe, until they were in the 5th or 6th grade. In their families, once you stopped believing, the quality and quantity of gifts from Santa declined. Why rock the boat?

Flash forward about 15 years.

I briefly attended Southwestern Baptist Theological Cemetery Seminary in Fort Worth. The place seemed to operate on two levels. In some classes the professors spoke as if every word in the Bible was inspired by God, and that all of scripture hung together as a unified statement and plan. But a few other professors would sometimes imply that the book was a mishmash. It was filled with time and place-specific rants that had to be twisted and tortured into relevance. A few brave souls, usually at the doctoral level, would introduce Biblical Criticism into the mix.

No professors publicly confessed any doubts about whether the basic story was true. And by true, I mean in the sense that this event happened, not true in the sense that something is a true to life parable or narrative that can teach us something about blah blah blah....

However, I found that if I could get these professors off the clock, and they would sometimes confirm that doubt was a valid response. Some of them would go so far as to give me further reading on the subject.

But by and large, the main response to doubt went something like this: "These stories have given comfort to millions. They are the foundation of our morality, our ethics, and our hope for the future. They are the received wisdom handed down from previous generations. If they weren't true, would God have given them to us? And one last thing.... people will give 10% or more of their income to spread God's Eternal Truth. But can you imagine anyone giving 10% of his money to spread a story that's just a parable? Churches and ministers that waver in their professed beliefs have a hard time paying the light bill."

In other words, once people start thinking of Santa Claus as a metaphor, you can't rely on them to put out milk and cookies in front of the fireplace.

We now have ministers all over the U.S. who no longer truly believe what they're preaching.  They no longer have a separate "carve-out" for stories about walking on water and resurrections and hells - a separate cubbyhole for the miraculous stories that otherwise would go the way of evles, reindeer and giant magic bunnies.  So why do they continue?

They don't want to be the Walt Burns who tells Glenn Williams what they've learned. They don't want to hurt their colleagues, financially or professionally, who still claim to take it all literally instead of figuratively. In some groups, to go against the story is to go against the entire tribe, and would mean rejecting family, town, denomination, and (ahem) salary. Sometimes it's too late to re-invent yourself as an insurance salesman, retail manager, or freight broker.

Plus, the church still owes $250,000.00 on the new education wing they built 10 years ago, and somebody needs to keep paying retirement funds into the Annuity Fund. 

When I'm feeling particularly dark, I sometimes tell people that I didn't learn the truth about Santa Claus until I spent 6 years training to be an elf.

Could there be anything sadder than a 25-year old who still believed in Santa?

On the other hand, could there be anything sadder than a 50-year old minister who lives on the same planet as theologian/scholars like Marcus Borg and John Spong, but who continues to proclaim the virgin birth, angelic visitations, and the eternal damnation of dead Muslim, Chinese, and Indian teenagers?

Let's make some changes, starting with a few obvious propositions. I don't believe in hell. I don't believe that I'll die and get some wings and a harp either. What happens after we die? I don't know. Neither does anyone else. But we can all agree on what happens to a tree when it dies, can't we? Let's start there.

Here's another one. I don't believe that Jesus got his Mama pregnant with himself.

I don't believe that languages were invented when people got uppity and tried to create a tower that would reach the sky and God felt threatened and punished everybody by giving them different languages. You don't believe that either. I promise, you don't. People... Just... Don't... Believe... That...

So if you're a minister who happens to read this rant, you have the blessing and approval of a lot of people to crawl up into your pulpit Sunday and admit what you don't believe certain things anymore. You're probably a good person with some good ideas. Give your folks something new to think about. The Santa Claus guided by Rudolph/Wise Men guided by the star in the east business - those stories don't work any more.

Sunday morning, tell us what you think will make the world better, without resorting to mythology.

I think you'll feel better afterwards. I feel better just writing all of this.

Merry Christmas !

The Pain, The Pain

Televangelist Oral Roberts once told his followers that unless they gave him 4.5 million dollars, the Lord was going to "call him home". He got away with it.


Barack Obama once told his followers that unless they gave him 700 Billion dollars in "stimulus", they were going to suffer an economic disaster. I bet he gets away with it. (The massive spending on the right side of this chart is supposedly a cure for the bad things on the left. LOL.)

BTW, Obama's top economic experts, Peter Orszag, Jared Bernstein, Christina Romer, Larry Summers, and Austan Goolsbee have ALL resigned. They came in, ripped off the Treasury, and got the hell out. There are some stains that they don't want on their resumes.

And yet there are still true believers who can't see it. No matter how likeable Oral Roberts and Barack Obama are, there really is such a thing as a con game. Admitting that you've been taken really does hurt.

Ayn Rand and Jesus and wanting to have your cake and eat it too

From Rational Public Radio comes an interesting essay about the two factions within the Republican Party - the Ayn Rand faction and the Jesus faction:

This may surprise you but I'm about to agree, in very large part, with the left wing Christian group American Values Network. They recently wrote an essay claiming that Jesus and Ayn Rand were incompatible. That you couldn't hold the values of both simultaneously.


On the surface, that shouldn't be a very controversial position. After all Rand was a notoriously militant atheist philosopher. With the rise of the Tea Parties, Rand's influence has been growing. Rand Paul R-KY assigns some of her work as required reading for his staffers. The Solicitor General, arguing before the eleventh circuit court that Obamacare violated the "constitution of Ayn Rand", but not the constitution of the United States.

After long decades of violent rejection of Rand, the GOP is starting to accept some of her ideas. Slowly, and incompletely no doubt. However, Just as the Republicans of old despised Rand for her atheism (see National Review's slanderous review of Atlas Shrugged) the left hates her for her unflinching support of Capitalism and Free markets.

Rand has risen high enough on the collective radar of the collectivists that they feel the need to counter her influence. American Values Network has released a startlingly honest and accurate attack on her.

"GOP leaders and conservative pundits have brought upon themselves a crisis of values. Many who for years have been the loudest voices invoking the language of faith and moral values are now praising the atheist philosopher Ayn Rand whose teachings stand in direct contradiction to the Bible."



Don't get me wrong, they couldn't be more mistaken in their evaluation of the moral status of Rand and Jesus. However, they couldn't be more right about the conflict between the two. On one hand, there is the mystical altruism commanded by the Bible. The purest political implementation of Altruism is Communism.

Hit the link to read the rest. 

Which of King Herod's programs would Jesus cut ???

"I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me... ... "And the King will say, 'I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!'"  - Matthew 25:36

From The Orlando Sentinel:

Members of Orlando Food Not Bombs were arrested Wednesday when police said they violated a city ordinance by feeding the homeless in Lake Eola Park.


....The penalty for violating Orlando's ordinance is 60 days in jail, a $500 fine or both.

Arrest documents state that Orlando Food Not Bombs received permits and fed more than 25 homeless people at Lake Eola Park on May 18 and 23. Coleman said the group rejected the permits.

From the Belief Blog:

A coalition of progressive Christian leaders has taken out a full-page ad that asks “What would Jesus cut?” in Monday’s edition of Politico, the opening salvo in what the leaders say will be a broader campaign to prevent cuts for the poor and international aid programs amid the budget battle raging in Washington.

What would Jesus cut?  As in, which of King Herod's or Caesar's programs would Jesus really get behind and lobby for and which ones would he campaign against?

Give me a freakin' break.   

The first King Herod (who supposedly murdered tens of thousands of Jewish babies) and Caesar (who had almost as many troops in the field as Obama) had different priorities than Jesus.  Herod and Caesar still have different priorities from the Jesus painted in our surviving gospels. 

When person A takes stuff by force from person B to give it to person C, it doesn't mean person A is a good person.  It usually means person A is simply a Statist thief. 
Person B isn't improved by the process either. 

Herod and Caesar hate, hate, hate competitors.  They don't want anyone else to deliver mail, defend property, maintain privacy, teach children, start a new currency, or in the case above, care for the homeless and hungry. 

"Give unto Caesar that which is Caesar's.  And then give him everything else.  For Caesar is freakin' awesome."  - Luke 20:25

********************

Thanks to Stephen Gordon on Facebook for the link to the Orlando Sentinel article.

I hope to do a YouTube video of this sometime soon.  Here's a song I wrote called "Let's Get Caesar Involved". 

"Jesus taught the multitudes one day in Galilee,
Must have been five thousand, and they all got hungry....
Disciples came to Jesus, and said "Get those people fed.
Jesus turned toward heaven, and this is what he said:

(bass) And he said

Let's get Caesar involved !
Caesar will get your problem solved. 
Go away and let me relax, that's why I pay all that tax,
You need to get Caesar involved. 

Three men saw a traveller that thieves had robbed and beat.
Two men were too busy, but one man stopped to speak
"Buddy that looks painful, yeah sometimes life's a bitch. 
Samaritans no longer pull your ass out of the ditch.

(bass) They just say...

Let's get Caesar involved !
He will get the problem solved.
I used to go the second mile, but in your case I think that I'll
Just try to get Caesar involved.

A wedding feast in Cana had just run out of wine,
One man said to Jesus, make us some moonshine...
But Jesus had no permits, nor a license to distill,
So he said I can't help you, but I know one who will

(bass) And he said

Let's get Caesar involved !
Government will get the problem solved. 
Give to Caesar what is his, next you'll give him all their is,
So let's get Caesar involved.

So if you're on life's highway, burdened with sin and shame,
Just call on Big Brother, just call out his name....
Don't call out for your neighbor, or friends and family,
They will just refer you to Washington, D.C.,

(bass) And they'll say

Let's get Caesar involved !
He will get the problem solved. 
If you find that you can't cope, call on Mr. Change and Hope....
That you can get Caesar involved.

(Repeat chorus forever and ever, praising Caesar and thanking him for his great and glorious works.) 

Touched by an invasion

Here's a close approximation of the Neocon response to Obama's decision to go into Libya....

First Baptist Church of Dallas, The Grinch Alert, Merry Xmas, and why Robert Jeffress needs a history lesson

The First Baptist Church of Dallas has started a "Grinch Alert" website.  Here's the Dallas Morning News:

First Baptist Church Dallas is keeping a list this season, and probably lots of people will be checking it twice, if not more.
The Rev. Robert Jeffress, the church’s pastor, today announced the launch of www.GrinchAlert.com , a First Baptist Web site where people can post the names of “naughty” businesses that use generic holiday language or nothing at all, rather than acknowledging Christmas through store displays, advertising or community relations.

“Too many businesses have bowed down to political correctness,” Jeffress said. “I thought this would be a fun way to call out businesses that are refusing to celebrate Christmas.”

The website features a “naughty” list but also a “nice” list for recognition of businesses that do acknowledge Christmas.

....“We’re letting readers and listeners make their own determination about who ought to be on the naughty or nice list,” Jeffress said. “This is just a forum to let people express their views. In a pluralistic society everybody gets to make their decision.”

Here's some more wholesome Baptist Jihadism from the Grinch Alert website.  If this doesn't remind you of Saturday Night Live's "church lady", you weren't paying much attention in the 90's:

Have you encountered a “Grinch” this Christmas season? Share your experiences here at GrinchAlert.com! Here, you can nominate businesses and organizations that shut-out expressions of Christmas in their interactions with the public via marketing, advertising and public relations. When companies use misplaced political correctness to halt the celebration of Christmas, they belong on the “Naughty List.”

We also want to know which companies are celebrating Christmas with excitement and meaning–especially those who keep Christ in Christmas where He belongs! Those companies and organizations will be placed on our “Nice List.” Help us preserve Christ this Christmas.

Of all the theologically unaware, culture-bound, divisive, and downright sanctimonious displays of historical ignorance I've ever seen, this is one of the worst.  It's almost enough to make me go into a cussing fit, but I intend for this post to be read from pulpits all across America next Sunday.
 
The following is an excerpt (actually, an entire chapter) from "Stories Behind The Great Traditions Of Christmas", by Ace Collins. 

On Xmas

Over the past sixty years or so, Christians have lamented the commercialization of Christmas.  Many have pointed to magazines, newspapers, and store advertisements that seem to pull Jesus out of the holidays by substituting an X in place of the name of Christ in the word Christmas.  While it is usually true that those who use Xmas these days are doing so to save space and shorten the word, Xmas is hardly a new concept - or an irreverent one.  Its use actually dates back to the earliest days of the Christian church. 

Many of the Gentiles who became the initial followers of Christ were Greek.  The Greek for Christ's name is Xristos (pronounced Christos).  While it is well known that a fish was often used as a symbol to denote churches and Christian gathering places during the ancient days of the church, many Greeks also used the letter X (pronounced chi) as their symbol of faith.  This X marked the places where they worshiped.  Therefore, the use of the letter X for Christ is one of the oldest traditions in the Christian faith - one of the first concrete symbols that signified the gospel message for people of all races and backgrounds.  Knowing that Greeks were following the teachings of a Jewish man was almost mind-boggling to scores of pagans during this time.  It also spoke volumes about the nature of Christianity - that all were welcome to become part of the family of God. 

The apostle Paul no doubt knew what the symbol X meant.  He had led a large number of his Greek brothers and sisters to Christ.  A majority of those who called the Savior Xristos financially supported Paul's missionary work and created an environment for the rapid growth of Christianity in Europe.  Many of these Greeks were so enthused about their faith that they helped ignite a fire that rapidly spread the word to the far corners of the known world.  Yet they paid a price as well. 

Countless Greek Christians were persecuted for their faith.  They were stoned, hanged, burned, and put to death in grotesque displays in Rome's Colosseum.  When a Christian was martyred, other Christians often traced an X to mark the spot where a true believer had  given his or her life in faithfulness to Christ.  Hence, in the initial days of Christianity, X was also the ultimate symbol of devotion and sacrifice. 

During the early days of the church, Xmas did not exist.  This was not because church leaders felt that using such a term would be a sign of disrespect.  Since carving letters into the stones of homes and churches was not an easy chore, having an X stand for the meeting place of Christians was fine with the clergy.  The reason that Xmas was not employed during the holiday season was that there was no holiday season.  It would be almost three and a half centuries before the church designated a date to celebrate Christ's birth, and even then Christmas was not a widely recognized holiday. 

Blogger note: And when the church finally decided on a date, they plopped it onto an earlier, pagan festival.  Winter Solstice.  Go here for details.  And when you get back, you'll always remember that the original, true December holiday greeting is "Happy Winter Solstice !!"   And if you say anything else.....you're a Grinch who bows down to the forces of Political Correctness.
Sorry for the distraction. 
Back to the Ace Collins chapter on the Christian origins of "Xmas":

Many of the early Christians had a basic education and could read.  But as time passed and the missionary movement spread the gospel across Europe, converts to the faith were largely unschooled. 

Kinda like whoever came up with this Grinch website.....

These men and women would not have recognized their own names on a document, much less the name of Jesus Christ.  Therefore, symbols became an important part of faith during the Dark Ages.  Some members of the clergy taught new converts that X was a symbol for Christ.  By writing the X, a man, woman, or child could easily spell out in one simple symbol what defined his or her faith. 

During the 16th century, as more and more European clergymen began to document the history of Christianity and to record the day-to-day business of the church, the use of an X for Christ was again widely employed.  It was during this time that the word "Xmas" first began to appear in the writings of Catholic clerics and monks.  Christ's name was probably abbreviated in this manner for three reasons.  The first was that almost all religious documents of the time were handwritten in a very ornate style.  A large X could be drawn in a much more artistic fashion than could the spelled-out name of Christ.  Thus, by writing Xmas with dramatic flair, the day of Christ's birth stood out. 

The second reason probably was that ink and paper were not as easy to come by as today.  Hence, shortening any word would save not only time but also precious resources. 

Ultimately, however, the primary reason many of the Christian writers of the time used Xmas was no doubt because of their knowledge of the Greek language and the early history of the church.  In the minds of these men, Xmas was a word of power that contained great devotional value.  It was a term that honored both the early Christian followers, many of whom became martyrs, and the Savior they had chosen to lead them.  The clerics wanted to make sure that believers remember the fallen heroes of the faith each Christmas. 

As time went on, and reaching a more educated public with a deeper understanding of what faith meant became more important, Xmas was again used by the church.  This time the term was employed to point out that while Christ's birth was necessary and was a cause for great celebration, it was his death and resurrection that gave real meaning to the Christian faith.  Therefore, the X in Xmas reminded believers not only of Christ's birth, but also of the most important Christian symbol, the cross. 

When Christmas finally evolved into a holiday with commercial significance in the mid-1800's....

(Thank you, Charles Dickens)

....retailers began to note the use of Xmas by certain small Christian groups.  In order to save print space and make their flyers and advertisements easier to read, stores picked up on this term based on a very old symbol.  It also made sense because in those days many Americans could not read.  It was far easier for them to grasp than a longer word like Christmas. 

Today, in a culture where few know Greek and almost everyone has a working knowledge of English, the need for employing the symbols of faith is not widely needed.  Hence, most Christians don't know that Xmas was first used by the church and not invented as a shortcut used by merchants during the commercialization of the holiday season.  The fact that the knowledge of the real meaning of X has slipped away from most Christian teachings is a great loss.  The early Greek believers did not know the joy of worshiping freely.  they did not celebrate Christ's birth publicly.  They often paid for their faith with their lives.  Yet they helped spread the gospel to the far corners of their world.  To them, living under the sign of X - the sign of Christ - was the ultimate statement of faith.  If they could visit today's world and see the term Xmas, they would immediately understand its correlation with the Son of God.  Thus, to them, Xmas would be one of the most wonderful and powerful traditions of the modern Christmas. 

And they would also look at that shameful Grinch Alert website, and ask First Baptist Dallas to take it down. 

Andy Barron - The Egocessary Prayer Candidate for Texas Governor

Since so many of you begin your Sunday morning devotions with a visit to this site....

Our text for today comes from the gospel of Matthew, Chapter 6, verse 5:

"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.

But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."

Please put aside your bibles, and turn to your internet.  Visit the site of Dr. Andy Barron, who is running for Texas governor.  Dr. Barron's first priority is as follows:

Prayer as a priority - Since 1962 when prayer was eliminated unnecessarily from public schools there has been a steady decline in morals of our society.

The good doctor gives us more specifics on his Issues page:

■Prayer and Religious Speech Protected Under 1st Amendment



■Establishment Clause Requires the Government to be Neutral Toward Religion, and Does Not Justify the Exclusion of Religious Speech


■Legislative Prayer Is a Permissible Acknowledgment of Widely Held Religious Beliefs in this Country


■The Rights of Students to Pray at School


■The Rights of Students to Pray at Graduation


■Equal Access allows individuals and groups to use government facilities for prayer and worship on the same basis that other individuals and groups are given access.

By all accounts, Dr. Barron is a great guy.  He has already accomplished more good in the world than I ever will. 
Unfortunately, he is focused on reviving one of the problems that our nation's founders were trying to escape. 

Dr. Barron grew up in Texas and went to Baylor.  The organizations he belongs to are predominantly Protestant, so let's assume he's a Protestant.  

Dr. Barron and other Christian Protestants can pray any time, anywhere.  In between this paragraph and the previous one, I prayed a simple prayer.  "God, please let this be a great post, and if it's okay with you, please let it be emailed around the world.  Please help Kathie Glass be elected Texas governor.  I want a pony.  Amen." 
You can't stop me from praying, at least in the Protestant sense of the word.  You can't stop me, and I can't stop you.  The legislatures can legislate all they want, and it doesn't do a bit of good. 

But there's another kind of prayer, the kind that Jesus was irked about in this morning's Bible reading.  Dr. Brent Beasley (of my own Broadway Baptist Church) calls this "Egocessary Prayer"  (That's a play on words with the phrase "intercessory prayer", where you ask God for blog hits, election results and ponies).  "Egocessary Prayer" is the kind I grew up hearing in school, at graduation services, before football games, and before most public events.  It basically means "praying out loud in public". 

For instance....
Before a Mississippi private academy football game, a preacher gets on the microphone and asks everyone to bow their heads, and asks God to bless (so and so).  Then the preacher thanks God for (so and so), and asks that He keep our young men safe on the football field while they are trying to kill each other. 
Then the preacher outlines the plan of salvation, not because God is fuzzy on the details, but because the preacher's congregation needs to know that the preacher is earning his pay and trying to convert the Catholics and Episcopalians. 
Bonus points are given for length, style, use of verbs from The King James version, and for passion.  I once heard the equivalent of a double reverse backflip triple-axle, when a preacher at a graduation service shoveled in something about the superiority of full-immersion baptism. 
And then finally, the preacher says "we ask these things in your son's name, Amen."
Then you can go on with your football game, graduation, or city council meeting.

What will happen down in south Texas when someone is asked to lead a public school prayer, and a priest decides to take advantage of the teachable moment and educate everyone on how to pray with a rosary?  (Note to Yankees, Europeans, and Aussies: No one living north of Waco can imagine this ever happening.)
Is Dr. Barron prepared to purchase storage facilities for Muslim prayer rugs? 
Is there time before a high school graduation to perform the "Festival of Ramen", the only way known to appease The Flying Spaghetti Monster?  Will the schools have to make reasonable accomodations for all the tongs, salad sporks, colanders, and cheese graters?  And if you think kids coming to school in gang colors are a problem, just wait until those who have been Touched By His Noodly Appendage show up in full pirate regalia. 

There are only 2 reasons for Egocessary prayer, as opposed to praying silently:

1) To show off.
2) To evangelize. 

There's no point in the first one, and The Founders were opposed to the second.  End of story. 

One last thing about the Barron candidacy, check out this video.  It's only 30 seconds long. 

Regardless of how you feel about Andy Barron as Texas governor, regardless of how hard you work to get him elected, or whether you do everything in your power to prevent him from becoming governor, none of that matters. 
You don't matter. 
Polls don't matter. 
Effort doesn't matter.
Planning doesn't matter. 
Andy Barron wasted his time becoming a doctor/dentist.  If people's health/teeth were going to improve, it was going to happen anyway. 

Please check out the video. It's only 30 seconds long.  I don't know why I'm bothering to ask you to watch it, since if you watch it, it was bound to happen anyway. 



Aren't you glad you got it over with?