My online friend NickM from the Counting Cats blog has anger issues.
When he is in full possession of his senses, I understand everything he writes.
But when Nick is truly outraged, he makes use of every British colloquialism, slang expression, and obscenity at his disposal. When this happens, I don't understand a word of it without making use of Google.
Please join me in asking Nick to translate this post into something resembling American English. Nick lived over here for a couple of years and I'm sure he can do it.
P.S. - I understand the part about the clawhammer.