Why so many Yankees fans left early

If you've been to many pro baseball games, you know about New York Yankees fans.  Loud.  Arrogant.  Abrasive.  They have a reputation for sticking with their team no matter what. 
But things have changed, haven't they? 
Last night's TV viewers were shocked to see so many empty seats behind home plate (and elsewhere) during the 8th inning. 
Why in the world would someone pay so much for a New York Yankees vs. Texas Rangers Championship Series ticket, and not stay for the entire game ???

Fortunately, we have some survey results.  These give us some insight into the minds of the "new" New York Yankees supporters.  1,000 guys were asked one simple question as they were leaving during the 8th:  "Why aren't you staying for the entire game?"
Here are the top responses. 

1) If you don't arrive by 11:00 p.m. at Barry Manilow's "Midnight and Moonlight Central Park Concert", all of the good blanket spots are taken. 

2) Macy's has an Early Bird Special on handbags.  Gotta be rested.   

3) The postgame spinach quiche at Tavern On The Green is simply to die for.  Fabulous. 

4) A direct quote:  "Mom gets anxious and irritable if she can't tuck me in before 11:00 p.m.  In my basement bedroom.  With all my Yankees penants.  And my Mickey Mantle posters.  And my Derek Jeter action figures."
 
5) There's a new tradition of leaving a few innings early to stroll arm-in-arm and do some
 window shopping along the beautiful tree-lined boulevards of The Bronx. 

6) Once you've heard Prince Poppycock, the Yankees' new Harry Carey, stick his head out of his skybox,  and sing "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the 7th inning stretch, it's all downhill from there. 

7) After the 8th inning, the only security on the subway is provided by New York police officers. 

8) The vendors ran out of sushi.

9) Too many outfield fights about who is "cuter": Alex Rodriguez or Andy Pettitte.

10) The Texas Rangers rocked.  It was pure, undiluted greatness. 

GO RANGERS  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Prayer For The Texas Rangers

Dear God,

I know that I am a sinner. 
I have no business asking you for anything. 
One of my earliest blog entries was based on a pun on the name of your servant, Oral Roberts.  I called it something funny just to get a lot of hits.  It's still getting them. 
Anyway, I'm sorry.  Please hear my prayer, and I'll delete it.   

Tonight, The Texas Rangers will face the despicable New York Yankees in the American League Championship Series. 

The Yankees have won the World Series 27 times.  Until we put away The Devil Rays a few days ago, we'd only won one playoff game.  Ever. 

The Yankees have had Babe Ruth, Joe DiMaggio, Lou Gehrig, Reggie Jackson, Billy Martin, and Mickey Mantle on their roster. 
The Rangers once had Mississippi taxidermist Ned Yost. 

I know that the Ballpark in Arlington is built on stolen land.  I know that George W. Bush threatened to pull the team out of Arlington unless he got a sales tax increase and a $205,000,000.00 subsidy.  I know he bought the team for $86,000,000.00 and then turned around and sold it for $250,000,000.00   I know that he never properly thanked the taxpayers. 
But the Yankees are worse.  They've won it all so many times that they now personify evil. 

I know that when Major League Baseball had their last big strike/lockout about 15 years ago, and I had to lay off about half the staff of my close-to-the-ballpark retail store as a result, I swore I would never again care about this silly game.  I know.  I know. 

This is about The New York Freakin' Yankees.  All God-Fearing people in this great Republic hate The New York Freakin' Yankees. 

Anyway, I'm not asking for much, God.  It just wouldn't be right.  We are all sinners, but can't you agree that some teams are worse than others?  I mean, seriously....

I'm not going to ask for a victory over the Yankees in the ALCS, and I wouldn't dream of asking for the Rangers to win it all. 

But is there any way you could arrange for Josh Hamilton to hit the game-winning RBI in World Series game seven?  That wouldn't be asking for too much, would it? 

The pictures of typical Yankee fans came from here.  The picture of She Whose Name Is Not Spoken came from here.